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| The Romance of Marketing |
As the Head of Marketing for Gods Dot Com, there are two things I know our investors want: finding that sweet spot for market penetration while maintaining brand intensity and a song played upon a lute that speaks to the heart. And it just so happens that I can master both of these. One of the reasons why Gods Dot Com is one of the most strategically based market positioned value added research and development firms is that we do the work. And I pull out the old lyre occasionally at a meeting and softly and sweetly sing a song of love or valor to all those in attendance at our joint application strategy sessions.
People often ask me at trade conferences: "Apollo, how can you find the time to develop qualitative marketing targeted distribution while bringing people to tears with your beautiful and masculine songs which pour forth effortlessly from your heart?" The answer is simple: I utilize a blend of segmentation continuums and the d-minor chord; the first offers a solid basis of understanding a specific demographic and the latter, a somber cadence which brings forth a tonal vulnerability. You see, I not only market the shit out of, whatever the hell we do at this company, I also market myself to the ladies. For sex. Which is really why I'm in this no holes barred world of high stakes marketing in the first place. And when you add the sweet terpsichordian experience of my honeyed tones, those panties are gonna drop faster than a product's awareness following an over saturation of the market by vertical placement.
Sure, a lot of people also tell me that I'm not really a true marketing professional if all I'm interested in is physical pleasure. To that I say, like the popular musicians and film stars of your age, marketing too can offer the electric high powered entertainment and energy any arts or cultural event provides. I mean, Tiger Woods didn't become a golfer to have sex with hundreds of women, but when you're that good at something, it just happens. And I'm that good at marketing. And intercourse.
I'm gonna market the shit out of you, baby.
People often ask me at trade conferences: "Apollo, how can you find the time to develop qualitative marketing targeted distribution while bringing people to tears with your beautiful and masculine songs which pour forth effortlessly from your heart?" The answer is simple: I utilize a blend of segmentation continuums and the d-minor chord; the first offers a solid basis of understanding a specific demographic and the latter, a somber cadence which brings forth a tonal vulnerability. You see, I not only market the shit out of, whatever the hell we do at this company, I also market myself to the ladies. For sex. Which is really why I'm in this no holes barred world of high stakes marketing in the first place. And when you add the sweet terpsichordian experience of my honeyed tones, those panties are gonna drop faster than a product's awareness following an over saturation of the market by vertical placement.
Sure, a lot of people also tell me that I'm not really a true marketing professional if all I'm interested in is physical pleasure. To that I say, like the popular musicians and film stars of your age, marketing too can offer the electric high powered entertainment and energy any arts or cultural event provides. I mean, Tiger Woods didn't become a golfer to have sex with hundreds of women, but when you're that good at something, it just happens. And I'm that good at marketing. And intercourse.
I'm gonna market the shit out of you, baby.
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